if you want me to...

There have been times in my life that caused me to question how I got to the place I was.  It also caused me to question why.  Why me?  What did I do?  How can I get thru this?  Where are the answers?  How can I change?  Why can’t I understand?  Yet, thru it all, I always had my faith in God.  Looking back over the last ten years or so, there have been many times when I felt overwhelmed, tired, helpless, and desperate.  But, even thru my pain, my heart knew there was always hope.  Hope and peace and comfort that could only come from God.  There was one particular Bible verse I tightly held close to my heart.  It soothed me and it seemed God had written it just for me...

He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.

Psalm 91:4 NLT

I know in my heart, there is a reason and a purpose for the road I travel with God...

when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

James 1:2-4 NLT

Also, there was a song I listened to a lot.  At that time in my life, I could relate to it.  I played it over and over....

If You Want Me To

Ginny Owens

The pathway is broken
And The signs are unclear
And I don't know the reason why You brought me here
But just because You love me the way that You do
I'm gonna walk through the valley
If You want me to

'Cause I'm not who I was
When I took my first step
And I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet
so if all of these trials bring me closer to you
Then I will go through the fire
If You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen
When you lead me through a world that's not my home
But You never said it would be easy
You only said I'd never go alone

So When the whole world turns against me
And I'm all by myself
And I can't hear You answer my cries for help
I'll remember the suffering Your love put You through
And I will go through the valley
If You want me to

in the field

Our church sanctuary is having a much needed renovation.  In the meantime, Sunday services are being held in a huge tent in the ball field used for Upward Soccer and Upward Football.  There are golf carts for those needing assistance from Sunday School classrooms to the ‘Church in the Field’.  There’s a huge supply of old-timey hand fans and cold bottled water, standing oscillating fans set up in strategic places to move air around, and song sheets.

My favorite thing was the overall environment.  It was relaxed, with casual clothing, and I’m sure people were smiling more than usual.  I don’t remember ever going to a church service in a tent.  But, I really liked the setting (despite the sweat...).  We sang hymns.  I love contemporary Christian music, but I also love the old hymns.  Today, I enjoyed:  In the Sweet By and By, Standing on the Promises, Rock of Ages, and Amazing Grace.  Nice.  The sermon was from Psalm 22.  I could hear the occasional ‘caw-caw’ from crows.  After all, we were in the field.

I admit, I did get distracted for a few minutes.  There’s a song I love dearly.  It’s on a cassette tape my sister gave us years and years ago (later transferred to a CD).  The album is ‘Evening Tapestry’, and the song is ‘Church in the Field’, and that’s where my thoughts drifted...

Church in the Field

The sky was one vast ceiling that vaulted out and on

Down to starry stain glassed windows of sunsets and of dawns

An out of doors cathedral day by day revealed

I remember church in the field

I remember church in the field

The rain fell like a sacrament on the alter of the soil

And mixed with sweat that fell from hands content with honest toil

The faith of spring saw harvest that seeds and earth would yield

I remember church in the field

I remember church in the field

There were blazing colors

There were lovely smells

I encountered passions my poetry can't tell

Mere religion hadn't tamed me yet, my reverence was all real

I remember church in the field

I prayed there without thinking

I worshiped from no cue

The flashing summer thunderstorm

And wild roses fresh with dew

And to mysteries and music always just concealed

I remember church in the field

I remember church in the field

There were blazing colors

There were lovely smells

I encountered passions my poetry can't tell

Mere religion hadn't tamed me yet, my reverence was all real

I remember church in the field

Written by Phill McHugh

happy independence day

words of wisdom

Those who control their tongue will have a long life;

opening your mouth can ruin everything.

Proverbs 13:3 NLT

Those who guard their lips preserve their lives,

but those who speak rashly will come to ruin.

Proverbs 13:3 NIV

ain't that the truth...

happy, happy anniversary...

To my dear husband of 34 years - I'm blessed God chose you and me to be married and have a wonderful life together!  You are my one and only, my always and forever, my beloved and friend...

happy, happy birthday...

Happy Birthday to the most adorable granddaughter ever!

I can't believe you're turning seven!  I've loved every minute of your life - from the first time I held you, to the 'I love you' at the end of our Skype visit today!

happy, happy birthday...

Today, my one and only child turns 32-years-old!  He was a good kid growing up.  As with any parent-child relationship, there were bad times and good times and terrible times and wonderful times and unhappy times and joyous times.  We did our best as parents, we really tried to do it right, but more times than not, we failed.  It is by the grace of God that he became the man he is today.  Looking back, it really had nothing to with our parenting skills, but had everything to do with the choices he made.

God has blessed him thru the years with an incredible purpose for his life, with a wonderful wife - the daughter I never had, and three of the most darling grandkids ever!

As I sit here recalling many special times in his life, tears flow down my cheeks and my heart is overflowing with love.  I thank God for blessing me with a son...who
means to world to me...

o how He loves you and me...

I've always loved poetry, and I enjoy quotes as well.  I’ve written a number of poems myself, but I’ve kept them all to myself.  I look for poems that relate to my life as it is, my life like it was, and the wonder of what my life can and will be.  Some poems reach deep inside my heart to find the things I hold dear, some fill my heart with emotions of love and joy and peace, and some flow from my heart with a burst of feelings it can’t contain.  

I’m thankful for the multitude of blessings God has given me.  I know I don’t deserve one iota of His:

love and sacrifice and joy and goodness and faithfulness and compassion and justness and peace and grace and righteousness and mercy and forgiveness and loving-kindness and protection.

Here’s one poem I came across today and thought I’d share:

GOD'S BLESSING of LOVE

What would we become without God's blessing of love
Lonely, depressed, scared, angry and sad.
With no one to yearn for or get excited about
No one to turn to, to keep thankful and glad.

Love is God's gift from Heaven to Earth
To help mankind endure its tribulations and pain.
Without God's love we falter, stumble and crash
To the point we can't help but cry and complain.

God knew what He was divinely creating
When He made us to seek and need love.
It helps us to be less selfish, hateful and cruel
As He juries what we practice from above.

God's love is the only reason man still survives
Without it hatred, fear and lust rule night and day.
Love helps us become more considerate, helpful and kind
As for others we labor, worry, provide, protect and pray.

~Tom Zart

♥♥♥

wonderful words

When the trumpet of the Lord shall sound, and time shall be no more,
And the morning breaks, eternal, bright and fair;
When the saved of earth shall gather over on the other shore,
And the roll is called up yonder, I’ll be there.

When the roll, is called up yonder, When the roll, is called up yonder,
When the roll, is called up yonder, When the roll is called up yonder I’ll be there.

i love this idea! (from pinterest, of course :)

wonderful words

Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine! Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God, Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.

This is my story, this is my song, Praising my Savior all the day long;
This is my story, this is my song, Praising my Savior all the day long.

wonderful words

What a fellowship, what a joy divine,
Leaning on the everlasting arms;
What a blessedness, what a peace is mine,
Leaning on the everlasting arms.

Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms;
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.

the fruit

wonderful words

There’s a land that is fairer than day,
And by faith we can see it afar;
For the Father waits over the way
To prepare us a dwelling place there.

In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore.

wonderful words

What a Friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

wonderful words

Heavenly sunshine, heavenly sunshine,
Flooding my soul with glory divine -
Heavenly sunshine, heavenly sunshine,
Halleulujah! Jesus is mine.

wonderful words

O victory in Jesus,
My Savior, forever.
He sought me and bought me
With His redeeming blood;
He loved me ere I knew Him
And all my love is due Him,
He plunged me to victory,
Beneath the cleansing flood.

wonderful words

His Name is Wonderful

His name is wonderful, His name is wonderful,
His name is wonderful, Jesus my Lord.
He is the mighty King, master of everything,
His name is wonderful, Jesus my Lord.
He's the Great Shephard, The Rock of all ages,
Almighty God is he,
Bow down before Him, Love and adore Him,
His name is wonderful, Jesus my Lord.
Isaiah 6:9

stones in my life...